Wednesday, June 06, 2007

I have a Menorah down there?

We see Harlow's pediatrician tomorrow for her 2month (technically her 2 1/2 month) checkup, an appointment that has inspired eagerness, curiosity and absolute dread. We'll finally get an answer to whether she's too big, we'll see how much she's grown and then there is the whole shot business that has me absolutely terrified.

But what has been preoccupying us the most lately? The proper care and washing of our baby girl's most delicate parts.

The past 2 trips to the doc involved her specifically instructing us on making sure to wash out the "cheesy" substances that were hiding out there since birth. On our second trip she checked and apparently we hadn't done a thorough enough job, a topic we dicussed as we were giving Miss H her bath for the evening. She had said something about leaving one part with the cheesy stuff alone but that other part? That would need to be cleaned, most definitely. So where, exactly, were we supposed to be washing? And thus ensued one of the strangest arguments in which we've ever participated. The labia majora or minora (which phonetically brought to mind a candelabra stashed in the hoo-ha)? And where the hell did they end and the thigh begin? There were pictures drawn in the air, diagrams consulted on the internet, (try googling THAT topic), and much giggling and a pretty terrible realization.

My husband knows more about my anatomy than I do.

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